there's nothing to say

there's nothing...i can't say it....there's nothing to be said....
^lies

i keep this to myself like an eggshell...restricting myself...wanting to break through....i'm scared

phones suck, and don't read into this too deep because it ain't pretty

girlfriend?

This weekend, Amy and her mom decided to take a little trip to Missouri...which turned out to be a big long snowy, icy, extra day, speeding ticket day all the way up and back from Missouri. They drove strait to St. Louis and on Saturday I went with them as we went to the arch, and then Amy and I made way back to Columbia to have some time to ourselves. We went to dinner with Angela, Nigel, Billy, Mike, Matt, and Rebecca that night and had a great time. Then Sunday, when she was supposed to go back to St. Louis, everything iced over. It was nasty crazy slip and slide ice outside and "unfortunately"... Amy had to stay an extra day with me. :D hooray! So that night, we went to Nigels and hung out with all the same people again and watched the PIE-rat movie. She left Monday morning and got back to SA Tuesday around 6(yes, it took her 2 days to get back home). I have to go to class....i'll post more later

HRMMM

So i was listening to Coldplay- Yellow, and i wondered to myself "why is this song so relaxing?" So i paused the song and played it in my head. It turns out that the few parts that have a louder guitar rift relax me. Then, i tried playing an Offspring song to see if the faster guitar and drums relaxed me in the same way...turns out no...it just excites me...after finding that the increased tempo was the exciting part of that song. Then i found a Pillows song that has a fast beat, and the thing about that song was the baseline. Seven nation army by the white stripes has a good base part (even though it's a guitar).

BUT THEN I NOTICED THAT 7 NATION ARMY WAS RELAXING ME....which was strange....because i just hop-scotched myself across a bunch of music using a totally random system of transitions....and then i wept, because i had just scared myself :(

SCHOOL STARTS TOMORROW!

I DID GOOD AT MY DIVING MEETS!

IT'S COLD!

sigh

the feeling of love is nothing other than a brilliant feeling. For this feeling, we sacrifice ourselves wholly to our hearts and live passionately trusting in our emotions, our desire, and not reason. These glimpses of insanity are called "romantic" and fade in and out of our lives...those lucky enough to encounter these moments may cherish them as long as one delights in a snowflake on their tounge.
For a moment, the bit of moisture is glorious and miraculous...then gone.

BUT! Unlike the snowflake! a love between two people stands, not like a fleeting snowflake, but like a seed in a bed of soil...

and i know this is long-winded and boring, but c'mon...when inspiration strikes, the blog thrives!

and also, btw i love my apartment because i live here with only ONE OTHER PERSON which is a new thing for me.

AND ALSO! two diving meets this weekend in Springfield. be there, or be not in missouri.

yeah i love her

YEAH I LOVE HER

but i can't see her face
and i can't have her touch
so i feel guilty
for not seeing her face, wanting her touch...for not needing her